tag, you're it.

standing is quite easy when all is calm on the western front. when the storms and winds rage, however, is when the true test comes. it's so easy to live when you're surrounded by those with similar passions....those who encourage and inspire you. but when the ugliness of negativity and the mundane, when the faint pulse of mere existance steadily drones on in your face day in, day out....living almost seems a mirage.
in those moments, it's so easy to allow all the crap you can't control engulf you...and before you know it BAM! you're right smack dab in the middle of it all. sacrificing life and freedom for existance.
why? it's easier, more convenient to just go with the flow than to make waves and fight for the precious life i've been given. especially at work.
why do i choose to settle and stoop to that level i've fought so fiercely to rise above? lol of course my typical response "well, if no one else wants to change or attempt to make things better around here, then why should i?"
that backwards logic works for a moment or two before reality beckons me again, reminding me i wasn't made
to be a voyeur, but a voyager. which leads to my next arguement. "well, there's no way on earth i'll be able to make any difference, and any attempt to 'go against the flow' will only frustrate and exhaust me."
yet, there's that still small prompting that won't go away, coursing through my veins with every heartbeat....."tag, you're it"
i have to admit, i don't like it. but i know if i want to hold onto the freedom i've been given, i have to step up to the plate. it won't be easy, but it will be worth it. if only i can remember that when i'm surrounded by the mundane.